Breakkk

I need a break!! Coz m bored - Its as simple as it gets.
I'm friggin exhausted of this routine. Tired of regular labs, assignments, record submissions. Just superr tired.
And if anyone's feeling the same? then please let me know the verdict of this. Coz Hey! same2sameee *low-5* ;)
Of all things, I would actually smile with idiocy is when I think of whole new bunk of books waiting to be read, Double choco chip icecream safely resting in refrigerator andand Pepsi waiting with enthu to be sipped ( btw love at first sip )
And the fact I've missed on many movies makes me go crazy.
So, I take a break.
Sit and finish whatever movies, movies, music I've slipped so far.

• A Separation [ Check]
• Les Miserables [Check]
• Zero Dark Thirty [Check]
• The Ugly Truth [Check]
• Cube Zero [Check]
• The Objective [Check]
• Two weeks notice  [Check]

Still, there exists a bunch of them which can't be put in amiss.
I have strange thing for photographs. Not much of a poser but I like keeping them. Much sorta, remembering That day in my own weird way. Hence, picture cuts and editing job has been taken upon.
And I swear I'd instantly dislike you if bring up " How're you?" " everything ok?" or anything related to studies. Pliss! Nope I'm not perfectly fine coz who'd be soo casually lazing around when exams are up ahead? So, NEVER MIND.

This book "The Litigators" which m currently reading isn't soo promising so far. Though I've just read half of it. It somehow fails to be a thriller in accordance to John Grisham who pledged it to be so. But there'z 260 odd pages left to finish, hope it changes my opinion.

Anyway, I'm sick of Facebook and twitter too. ( Yeah! you heard it right )
I'll brb when m out of this too-bored-to-give-a-damn paranoma.
Thereby, this is How I feel - Distant from everything

I can't end this post without mentioning this song.
Its stuck in my head for so so so longg

Lana del Ray just makes it sound so gorgeous.

In case you were wondering,

Nope I'm no sad.

I know, my post makes no sense afterall.

But yeah, Imma happy girlll 

And so should everyone bound to be!

Till next post,

Cheers youu :-)

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You're my merry

You're that dream

 I can never remember..

You're that memory

 which can never get faded..

You're that happiness

 I can never own.

You're that wishlist..

 in which sea of emotions gets welled up..

You're that star 

which twinkles tauntingly and vanishes..

You're that fear

I can never embrace

You're that fiction

of a romantic novel

You're that inspiration

which makes me recreate melodies

You're that early hot coffee

which would hurt my tongue, yet I'd sip..

You're that smile

which pricks a tear unavoidably..

You're that pretentious mistake..

which I'd make anyway..

You're that wall

I can never lean..

You're that run

I can never keep...

You're my guileless bewilderment

You're beyond them, You're beyond all..

You're my Recklessly Mean Merry to beam about. 

And what do I do when I dunno what to do? I DRAW. YESSSH!
Wheee! It feels good. So, Yay!
If only I had enough colours :(
I'd have doodled more..

And you know what makes me so excited?
My blog's birthday goes hand-in-hand with Christmassy eve :D

So, Merry Christmas people!!
Lets hope for faith with glee :D


Happy week ahead :-)

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You name it..What? Meaningless? Okay

I have nothing to write, yet I wanna write..weird, no?
Okay, so what do I write? Where does inspiration vanish just when you need it dearly?

Holding onto the possibilities..
 For as speechless a melody can make us
        as many perceptions our pea-sized head can draw
        as  far as our lameness can take us by surprise
        as mysterious as a tale of Raymond Chandler
        as delicate as the touch of colorful bubbles...

Rest I dunno :P
I can't think of any..
Maybe I don't know how to describe this..

                                             
Sometimes inspite of being clear of what you don't want,
we have no clue of what we want even..
 Like when people ask me " So.. what will you do next year?" I simply hide behind a book
 There are two sides for every thought of mine..
 To top it all, I dunno whats with me and this pensive talk...


Life's.. just unfortunate at this point.
It's in such a big puddle of MESS.
I know I should do something to fix it or make sure that It's the same as before.
But, frankly.. I'm just too tired to care anymore.

I wish I could tell you how ridiculously toxic you are to me..
If only I could comprehend this, at all
or know what to do with this assumption.
On one side is you, with whom I don't mind sharing all the silliest talk..
On the other, there's this voice-in-my-head asking me not to be vulnerable much.
I don't mind seriously. For I'm not scared anymore...


What have I got to loose anyway?
Inspite of you being the one the reason I regret putting my guard down.
There's still this fear of not having you to talk to after a pointless day.
But, then you decided to turn your eyes back.
Which I'm sure you are doing now.. :P

All I can say is..
No matter how pissed off you make me..
                     how angry I get you to be..
                     how much I would regret writing this. (I'm ignoring that part)
                       A part of me is always going to care.
                                And, as much as I hate it. 
                            I know that even after everything,
           I'm always gonna choose you to talk to at the end of the day.                       
Because..
Someone just told me..
People may leave when you're not looking..
Moments pass when you just start living in it.

P.S. Okay loong boring post, no? Anyway one good thing of last week is Mom's birthday :D
        She'z happy she said. And you just know it sometimes. What more do I want?


Happy week ahead :-)

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Nothing hits harder than..No Sleep!

Its weird how things seems perfect for a sec turn out to be a feigned image formed in head.

I overthink. Yes.
And what help does it do? Well, it blesses me bouts of headache which is nothing more or less like a hangover without actually drinking. Huh! its huge.
Peaceful sleep seem like a myth these days.
Talks with my bestie. Don't help.
Watching sitcoms. Don't help.
Book world. Don't help either.
I've read this book "The Other side of Midnight" by Sidney for I dunno like ages. I lost my grip at it. Book'z good but not as captivating like his other best works i.e. Master of the Game or Tell me your Dreams etc.
And ofcourse never take too many breaks amidst your read. It will only diminish your interest.
"If Tomorrow comes" is one book am awaiting.
Okay, back to the main point. Sleep just ditches me for no apparent reason. I hardly manage to sleep for 3 hrs in the whole day.
And to make matters worse..
I stop talking suddenly.
Start loosing my temper.

I dunno what'z the state of my mind. All it does is shout I don't want this.
I'm disturbed.
May be I'm no good at expressing self.
May be people aren't what I thought they were. And I've mistaken much.
I dunno what more I expect from life.
I dunno why I give this undying prior to few people.
I dunno why I get upset on things I should be least bothered about.
I dunno why I cut off people who of all would never put me in a position to doubt my craziness.
I dunno who kidnapped my wishful thinking.
                           
But these effing thoughts are so consuming that zoom out peace from life.
I don't wanna care. Not a inch more or less.

Anyway all the complaints come down to..
Sometimes we need a patient person who'd let you rant, cry, listen to all the crap and still term you cool :D
Sometimes we need them to tell us we're happy and make us believe it. May be for little time.
Sometimes we need to be THAT PERSON ourselves.
Coz hey! we're no less than awesome. ;)

So, my blog's anniversary'z in 13days!!
Can't believe I've managed a year of monsters in invisibility cloak ;)
Of all the amiss. Writing makes me feel good. Its an attempt to leave a trail of weariness behind.
And as long as we're talking of being really strange. Welcome to my life. :P

Till next post...
Cheers :-)

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Such Randomness

Life can be confusing, that we all know
But I didn't know Mother Nature can be confusing too..
Anyways first read this :P

I've got a complaint to Nature--

                              Why Oh Why? Do you shower like its the end of the world,
        right when we're having our exams and frizzle this soothing cool breeze when we're using our life-long-will-power to study for the next day's exam... How could we possibly read with you thundering all night and sending us secret messages like Enough of studying, go sleeepp!


                             And somehow when we are done with our exams..and with the given few holidays we expect you to still be the same. But no! You Change.. You become Sunny and force us to stay indoors..
  Why Haan Why? Why wouldn't you let us enjoy your titter-pattering noise? Why couldn't you just stay for few more days?

No. I don't want flood or something..
It would've been good if you just drizzled for a bit in the evening..
Making it cool enough to let us sit in our balcony reading or having a cup of coffee or just talking with my Mom..
It would've been enough, you know...
Bouts of time spent with you are always felt worthwhile :)
I don't know what kind of a storm is whirling inside your head but make me understand, may be?

Okay I forgive you this time :P
But next time, plan  your day in accordance with me no..please ;)


For a few moments, its fine to allow yourself the luxury of slipping into make-believe world where You wish for things and they actually happen...

I didn't end my post just yet..and this pic came out of no where, so am gonna talk about it anyway :P
Btw he's my Dad! :)

Him And Me <3

I'm not bragging or something but he's actually fun to be with...
He passes comments just like us,
He laughs at my jokes ( Sometimes only to make me happy..but lets ignore that part Ok)
He the reason I hate my nose.
He can be irritating at times, like repeating the same thing over and over. The weird part is, he knows it!
He never agrees to me at my first go. But a li'l pestering is enough for him to say "Let's see" and my works done already! :D
I take him for granted. Not a good thing but What to do.
I love him soo much that I would make sure that he never comes across this post :D


Oh yeah! Its festi week ahead..
We all have our own share of sour grapes,
So lets pray that we get to eat them less and enjoy the taste of happiness with cherry.. ;)
Talking about eating, am off to eat my double cheese burst pizza. ( Not much of a cheese fan but just trying..)

Happy Diwali... :-)
Be safe..
Merry week ahead.

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Living Through The Perks

                                   

                                            Have you ever read a book that u actually felt like filled with your thoughts or those words which you couldn't be bold enough to speak them out? Well, this definitely is one kind of book. Some stories are never complete. Honestly, this book has nothing to do with innovative ideas or great scribe of  letters put together. Its the envelope of innocence, simplicity, candor of a high-school kid's thoughts put into much effortless captivating words.

I won't reveal much about the plot but it includes the classes of friendship, fear, love, what not? everything that shows the transition between a naive kid to a mature minded person. Charlie is the person who narrates the story and its from his perspective the story is weaved. He makes two good friends Sam and Patrick who become part of his family eventually.

I liked the way how friendship is unmistakably put into plain explanation jumbling with thoughts. The writer was successful in keeping the reader focused right from the first page such that you start thinking from his view and live it like its own. Everyone has friends but how exactly can you pick a random call to your friend anytime of the day having no reason but just to blabber and listen what he/she says in return and consider that the other person doesn't think your disturbance is actual disturbance? There's a difference. Let me tell you its exceptional. Cherish them. I can bluntly name a few in my fingertips and its this silent promise I make to them of standing up for them no matter what odds. How amazing is that? Some good laughs. Some jokes. Some definitions. Some serious talks about matters of heart shared with them often becomes unique.

In the course of life, ways may part. We come across heartbreaks, betrayal, clouds of darkness that blows us hard on the face. It happens with everyone. But the warmth, the love, the giggles, the comfort, the connectivity, the serenity, the elatedness and the uplift will always finds its way. May be late. May be when we're on certain urge of giving up on our passion, then these are going to keep us sane.

They are certain words in the book that left me thinking. Really, they were just sentences but definitely had its own story in them. 

Few thoughts, few lines, few expressions bring commotion for keep drowning in it word by word.

                                         


My favorite quotes from the book:

• So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.
• We accept the love we think we deserve.
• “He’s my whole world.”
  “Don’t ever say that about anyone again. Not even me.”
• Sometimes, I read a book, and I think am the people in the book.
• And in that moment, I swear we were infinite.( THIS!!! is my most fav one)
• And the people in the photographs always seem a lot happier than you are.
• I think it was the first time in my life I ever felt like I looked “good.” Do you know what I mean? That nice feeling when you look in the mirror, and your hair’s right for the first time in your life?
• Things change. And friends leave. And life doesn’t stop for anybody
• “I would die for you. But I won’t live for you.”
• Please believe that things are good with me, and even when they’re not, they will be soon enough. 

They are many more...

When to read:

Its a short one. Hence, best when you're travelling. Reason? Well I'll give 2 of them..
1.Goes without saying, its a simplistic read.
2. You'd get the satisfaction that you finished a book in your travel :P 


On that note..
keep reading as much as you can..
Smile always :-)

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That'd be great

We shall sing our song
Upon the roof, underneath the glinting stars
We shall write our song
Weaving words of comfy silence
Lulling each other to sleep

Coz we choose 
                           Maggi and hot chocolate over ritzy dinners
                           Gleaming light and an old song over Disco jazz
                           A simple delightful icecream over fancy desserts
                           Handwritten letters over costly gifts ( Nothing..I mean like NOTHING can beat this feeling of reading a letter. No matter how mushy or cliche it may be :D )
                         
Y'know, what else we could do?
                           Dance crazy like maniacs. (Yes! Chandler kinda dance is more fun :P )
                           We can kid each other.
                           Roam hand in hand laughing
                           Blabber lame/idiotic/nonsensical stuff. By virtue of being happy.

We will just be fine better Awesome.
We are proud of our flaws
We together laugh at our stupidity and flex our cool selves most fully.
Coz our definition of  Peace is Having each other by our side FTW
             
                                        

                                         Captured by my close-est friend :D
                                          And and little editing done :P
                                          Oh! Did I tell you how much I love her?
                                          She'z one crazy adorable self @Sowmya :)

  Ending on a happy note
   Cyah! till next post
   Cheers  
   Spread smiles :) :)                       

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On the note of 'Lists'

My "Oh My God, Why?" list:

1. Why is it that we like to confide in strangers?
2. Why do we (especially ME)  ALWAYS  make someone the "center of my universe" ? when clearly my presence is "Nothing" to them??
3. Why do we hold all the little moments, wrap them, write about them and hide it safely in our secret closet...reliving each bit of them in our dreams?? when those "someone" can't even recall them.
4. Why do we always try to be genuinely nice to those who've done nothing but gossip about you?
5. Is being diplomatic helpful?
6. Why do we feel so far even if we are with people who are absolutely fun to be with?
7. Why should we pretend like nothing ever happened? when all you want to do is shout, yell and spill out the demons-inside-your-head.
8. Why should I be on guard with my free-spirited gypsy unafraid to speak my mind attitude? so on... (there's lot more)

I'm actually expecting a background score from Karan Johar ( It would add to the moment you know ;) )


My "Lets Be.." list:

1. Lets be careless, mad and senselessly un-monitored with 'being our self'
2. Blah to those who put on magnifying glasses and inspect each word of yours to twist them.
3. Shoo away those who look upon all angles to put/bring you down. ( They should've been very good with Geometry, no? ok, bad one :P )
4. Always give a stand to those who y'know would do the same when tables turn. Yes, expectation is good only if they're your closest ones. ( Lets not fool ourselves with the word 'close' now!)
5. Lets make up after big big fights.
6. Lets laugh and make fun of each other only in each others presence.
7. Lets have those pointless talks, unguided walks.
8. Lets not make anyone feel odd or left out. Happiness comes when smiling faces multiplies.
so on...


Too much whining going around, no?
This song should make up for it ;)
          

                        Of companionship as cold as Ice

                                              Lets not alter our views depending on the 'actions'. They are momentary, impulsive or may be just may be has a  story of itself. If we care, ponder on the 'cause' otherwise just 'let it be' who cares? 

Little poetry: 

A walk, little talks...
A song, to fit in silences..
A sarcastic taunt, to brush the nervousness..
A little longing, post meetings..
A speck of silliness, to mentor our course..
A escape, for all unasked promises..
A Just This moment, to set eyes wandering for reasons..
A melodramatic fight, for laughter..
Because 
Not All Who Wish For Are Left Disappointed...
Tiny moments of joy strengthens you through all odds!!                            




If you've friends who are half as crazy as you, who fathom easily, and so you can possibly be your sappy and cranky self. Then you sir, are damn lucky. *Obligatory sniff and a bow*


Thanks for listening,
Cheerios for happy week ahead :-)

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So, Its Goodbye? All like that?!

                         The clock ticked 1 in the morning, waking her up. She then realized that she dozed away on the book she was reading earlier. No, she couldn't study this way. Cursing her tiredness, she jumped out of her warm cozy bed, washed her face, made herself a cup of tea and determined to finish her last minute revision for her next day exam. She read for half an hour when her phone beeped prompting new message. She hoped against hope that it was from him.As expected it wasn't from him.
                     
                           She couldn't believe that she still expected some communication with him.Him! He! the heart throb of any girl. He was smart, easy to be with, simple and gorgeous in his infinite mannerism. She adored him for long but little did he know her state. Magically, he did talk to her one day and from then the constant giggles, escaped glances became a part of their lives. But as they say, happy things don't come without some *conditions apply* tag. His family moved to other state. Still they tried their best to fight the distance between them.
                           
                            There was this one opportunity that striked them to make the circumstances favourable.   It was the very day last year, when she was doing her study, he phoned her. They talked all the very things happening around them. Talking to him, eased her nervous self.

He: This exam is very important for us, Sia. We can be together if you clear this exam and come here
She: I know Sanju.. and that's why I'm all tensed up.
He: Why? You'll make it.
She: Ohh! I'm not sure of that. *sobs*

                             She couldn't change the past happenings. She hardly could gear herself up to that fateful day when she screwed her papers. Things changed after that. The ambiance diverged. People altered their priorities.

                 Their priority list was same but in an upside down order. He topped her list.

                              The thought of him bought both happiness and tears. She couldn't stop herself and immediately sent him a message 'We are not going to talk anymore, are we?' and pressed sent. Cursing her impulsiveness. Of course, she asked for a tiny contact of being friends at the very least when he showed the inclination for breaking up. Deep down they both knew, being friends would do no justice to them. Infact, that 'F' word would strangle their emotions to death everyday. It would make it more difficult for them.

*beep* *beep* new message
                        
                             No, she didn't want to see it. She knew what he would reply. She looked away and couldn't tug a pointless war and opened the message.

He: It would hurt both of us.
She: But do you want to? 
He: Frankly, no.

                              There was no second thought for that reply. He made his decision and now its her turn to make hers. She honestly didn't expect something great to happen but anything little show of affection would've made her feel good. No, she wouldn't cry anymore. Leaving her tangled memories behind. She prepared for that same exam that uprooted her dreams. For she wanted to prove, it wasn't really the distance that parted them. Gathering all her strength and her zeal to clear that exam and enter that very college of his made her strong.


to be continued...
         
                            

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