You're my merry

You're that dream

 I can never remember..

You're that memory

 which can never get faded..

You're that happiness

 I can never own.

You're that wishlist..

 in which sea of emotions gets welled up..

You're that star 

which twinkles tauntingly and vanishes..

You're that fear

I can never embrace

You're that fiction

of a romantic novel

You're that inspiration

which makes me recreate melodies

You're that early hot coffee

which would hurt my tongue, yet I'd sip..

You're that smile

which pricks a tear unavoidably..

You're that pretentious mistake..

which I'd make anyway..

You're that wall

I can never lean..

You're that run

I can never keep...

You're my guileless bewilderment

You're beyond them, You're beyond all..

You're my Recklessly Mean Merry to beam about. 

And what do I do when I dunno what to do? I DRAW. YESSSH!
Wheee! It feels good. So, Yay!
If only I had enough colours :(
I'd have doodled more..

And you know what makes me so excited?
My blog's birthday goes hand-in-hand with Christmassy eve :D

So, Merry Christmas people!!
Lets hope for faith with glee :D


Happy week ahead :-)

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You name it..What? Meaningless? Okay

I have nothing to write, yet I wanna write..weird, no?
Okay, so what do I write? Where does inspiration vanish just when you need it dearly?

Holding onto the possibilities..
 For as speechless a melody can make us
        as many perceptions our pea-sized head can draw
        as  far as our lameness can take us by surprise
        as mysterious as a tale of Raymond Chandler
        as delicate as the touch of colorful bubbles...

Rest I dunno :P
I can't think of any..
Maybe I don't know how to describe this..

                                             
Sometimes inspite of being clear of what you don't want,
we have no clue of what we want even..
 Like when people ask me " So.. what will you do next year?" I simply hide behind a book
 There are two sides for every thought of mine..
 To top it all, I dunno whats with me and this pensive talk...


Life's.. just unfortunate at this point.
It's in such a big puddle of MESS.
I know I should do something to fix it or make sure that It's the same as before.
But, frankly.. I'm just too tired to care anymore.

I wish I could tell you how ridiculously toxic you are to me..
If only I could comprehend this, at all
or know what to do with this assumption.
On one side is you, with whom I don't mind sharing all the silliest talk..
On the other, there's this voice-in-my-head asking me not to be vulnerable much.
I don't mind seriously. For I'm not scared anymore...


What have I got to loose anyway?
Inspite of you being the one the reason I regret putting my guard down.
There's still this fear of not having you to talk to after a pointless day.
But, then you decided to turn your eyes back.
Which I'm sure you are doing now.. :P

All I can say is..
No matter how pissed off you make me..
                     how angry I get you to be..
                     how much I would regret writing this. (I'm ignoring that part)
                       A part of me is always going to care.
                                And, as much as I hate it. 
                            I know that even after everything,
           I'm always gonna choose you to talk to at the end of the day.                       
Because..
Someone just told me..
People may leave when you're not looking..
Moments pass when you just start living in it.

P.S. Okay loong boring post, no? Anyway one good thing of last week is Mom's birthday :D
        She'z happy she said. And you just know it sometimes. What more do I want?


Happy week ahead :-)

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Nothing hits harder than..No Sleep!

Its weird how things seems perfect for a sec turn out to be a feigned image formed in head.

I overthink. Yes.
And what help does it do? Well, it blesses me bouts of headache which is nothing more or less like a hangover without actually drinking. Huh! its huge.
Peaceful sleep seem like a myth these days.
Talks with my bestie. Don't help.
Watching sitcoms. Don't help.
Book world. Don't help either.
I've read this book "The Other side of Midnight" by Sidney for I dunno like ages. I lost my grip at it. Book'z good but not as captivating like his other best works i.e. Master of the Game or Tell me your Dreams etc.
And ofcourse never take too many breaks amidst your read. It will only diminish your interest.
"If Tomorrow comes" is one book am awaiting.
Okay, back to the main point. Sleep just ditches me for no apparent reason. I hardly manage to sleep for 3 hrs in the whole day.
And to make matters worse..
I stop talking suddenly.
Start loosing my temper.

I dunno what'z the state of my mind. All it does is shout I don't want this.
I'm disturbed.
May be I'm no good at expressing self.
May be people aren't what I thought they were. And I've mistaken much.
I dunno what more I expect from life.
I dunno why I give this undying prior to few people.
I dunno why I get upset on things I should be least bothered about.
I dunno why I cut off people who of all would never put me in a position to doubt my craziness.
I dunno who kidnapped my wishful thinking.
                           
But these effing thoughts are so consuming that zoom out peace from life.
I don't wanna care. Not a inch more or less.

Anyway all the complaints come down to..
Sometimes we need a patient person who'd let you rant, cry, listen to all the crap and still term you cool :D
Sometimes we need them to tell us we're happy and make us believe it. May be for little time.
Sometimes we need to be THAT PERSON ourselves.
Coz hey! we're no less than awesome. ;)

So, my blog's anniversary'z in 13days!!
Can't believe I've managed a year of monsters in invisibility cloak ;)
Of all the amiss. Writing makes me feel good. Its an attempt to leave a trail of weariness behind.
And as long as we're talking of being really strange. Welcome to my life. :P

Till next post...
Cheers :-)

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